Hangin on

Barely, but we're still in this.

Drove down to the clinic today because I knew I was going to have my endometrial biopsy at some point. Perhaps you can imagine how you might feel after having a wire brush inserted through your cervix, then swirled around your uterus to rough it up a bit, all in the hopes of making implantation that much more effective.

Yeah, good times. White hot pain. Short, but there. Uncomfortable as hell. And certainly not made better by the nasty cooter cam ultrasound that pokes your now very full left ovary time after time after time. And oh yeah, Dr. H also had to use some kind of tongs to reach in and 'hold' my cervix since it wasn't cooperating.

I hurt today. A lot.

For whatever reason, I find that the general discomfort when stimming is much higher now than in has ever been. No clue why, just lucky I guess. And this is with far fewer eggs than I've recruited in the past. For whatever reason, it would appear that my right ovary is bound to remain dormant, and it looks like ALL viable follicles will come from my left side.

No pressure, leftie. Hang in there.

So when all was said and done it was thought best for me to just head straight home and chill. Work was great about it, which I very much appreciate, so I was back in my driveway (after a hair raisingly soggy drive home) by 10:30 or so. Ahhhhh.....

E2 went up to 1206 today. Still not stellar, but at this point, I'll take it. Tonight we add the 150 of bravelle to the 300 of Gonal F, and hope for the best. And then, get this, I get to sleep in tomorrow! No need to go to the clinic. They're not worried that my LH is going to surge, so I'm off the hook for a day. And couldn't be happier.

I will still drive into Toronto tomorrow at some point though to take a fellow Hannam IVFer and blog reader up on her very generous offer. You see, because things are slow to recruit he'd like me to stim for a few more days, and that means I need more Gonal F - which Kate has so kindly agreed to assist with. Yet again I'm nothing short of blown away by the generosity of my virtual friends. As cheesy as it sounds, it's taken a village to bring this cycle to fruition, and I thank you so much Kate for completing what T&F so graciously started where the drugs are concerned.

Dr. H has also decided that he might not go ahead with the orgalutron to suppress me and prevent me from ovulating before it's time because I simply don't surge on my own. Like, never. In all the cycles I've ever done, my LH has never gone above 4 without a trigger shot. And since the org can cause a temporary slowdown of the estrogen production, which I most certainly can't afford right now, we just might actually go through the entire cycle with no suppression. Dr. H said he had a similar situation with another patient who doesn't surge and, well, she's pregnant now.

I like the sound of that. :)

So there's today in a nutshell. Follies and their discomfort increasing, E2 making a slow but steady climb, new drugs to add to the mix, the incredible generosity of others who've been there, and a complete re-jigging of the protocol as we go.

And lookie there, my levels of hope are slowly starting to creep back up as well.

Thanks as always for the great thoughts!