So yeah, negative beta today.
I waited forever to get my call and was flipping out. I knew what the result was, but needed to KNOW, ya know? Sigh.
I had one meeting today - one - from 2:30 to 3:30. I usually get called well before 1 with a beta, and by 2pm I was still sitting there, at my desk, waiting for the stinking phone to ring.
I was starving, my blood sugar was crashing, and I couldn't leave my desk in case I missed the call. I finally had to email a colleague and ask him to heat up my lunch for me so I could eat. At my desk.
He finally replied, helped me out, and I could then stuff the roast chicken and potatoes into my gullet. At which point the person I was meeting with showed up - 15 minutes early.
She wandered off to chat with someone else while I continued to suck back the protein. Finally the phone rang at about 2:25 and I got the news I knew was coming, but dreaded anyway.
Negative. Follow up/review appointment booked for October 5.
Fuck.
There's so much going through my head right now, but I don't have the strength to put it all out on to the page today. Maybe sometime soon.
Thanks to all for following along and for the good wishes on the way. It's much appreciated.
The planting schedule - redux
1 - July 2 - baseline AFC 28, E2 202, FSH 4.8. Start stims, 300IU Gonal F
4 - July 5 - E2 356, LH 2, P4 2.7 Follicles 1.5 (likely cyst) on right, 1.3, 1.2, .9 on right (cyst may be gone), lining .9
6 - July 7 - E2 673, LH 2, P4 4.7 Follicles 1.5, 1.0 on right, 1.4, 1.3, 1.1, 1.0, 0.9 on left, Lining .9
7 - July 8 - E2 833, LH 2, P4 4.6, Follicles 1.5, 1.0 on right (no change), 1.6, 1.3, 1.3 ,1.3, 1.1, 1.1, 1.0 on left. Lining .95
8 - July 9 - E2 1206, LH 2, P4 4.4 Follicles 1.5, 1.0 on right, 1.75, 1.5, 1.4, 1.4, 1.3, 1.3, 1.1, 1.1, Lining 1.0
10 - July 11 - E2 2203, LH 3, P4 3.6 Follicles n/a on right, 2.1, 1.7, 1.5, 1.4, 1,4, 1.3, 1.3, 1.2, 1.1 Lining 1.0
11 - July 12 - E2 3319, LH 6, P4 5.5, Follicles n/a on right, 2.45, 1.85, 1.75, 1.7, 1.55, 1.45, 1.3, 1.2, 1.0 Lining 1.0
12 - July 13 - E2 4849, LH 11, P4 5.9, Follicles n/a on right, 2.5, 2.0, 1.8, 1.7, 1.7, 1.7, 1.6, 1.4, 1.2 Lining 1.0
13 - July 14 - E2 5663, LH 14, P4 7.3, Follicles n/a on right, 2.5, 2.2, 2.1, 2.0, 1.9, 1.9, 1.9, 1.7, 1.3, 1.2 Lining 1.2 Took trigger shot at 8am. Post wash numbers 60M with 90% motility. IUI number one at 12:35pm
The planting schedule - 2009's epic fail
July 25 - start Marvelon birth control pill
August 14 - endometrial biopsy
August 15 - last bcp
August 17 - sign consents and pay fees
August 21 - baseline AFC 27, E2 259, LH 2, P4. 3.1
August 22 - start stims...225 Gonal F, 75 Menopur
August 25 - day 4 check in. E2 550, LH 2, P4 3.1. Lining .4. No change in meds, three small follies measuring .7, 1.0 and 1.1. Lots of quiet ones. Grow follies grow!
August 27 - day 6. E2 737, LH 2, P4 2.8. Lining .56. Follicles 1 @ .9, 1 @ 1.1, 3 @ 1.1. Back tomorrow, same meds, getting nervous
August 28 - day 7. E2 1036, LH 1, P4 3.4. Lining .67. Follicles right 1.1, 1.0 left 3 @ 1.3, 1.0
August 29 - day 8. E2 1389. LH1, P4 3.63. Lining . 73. Follicles - must update later, lost my paper. Ugh.
August 30 - day 9. E2 2154. LH 1, P43.4 Lining .7. Follicles rt - 1.4, 2 @ 1.3, 1.2, 2 @ 1.1 left - 1.7, 1.6, 1.5, 1.4, 3 @ 1.1, 2 @ 1
August 31 - day 10. E2 2656. LH 1. P4 3.2 Lining .7. Follicles rt - 2 @ 1.5, 1.4, 2 @ 1.2, 1.1 lft - 2 @ 1.8, 2 @ 1.7, 1.3, 2 @ 1.1, 2 @ 1.0
September 1 - day 11. E2 3301. LH 1. P4 3.63 . Lining 1.0. Follicles ft - 1.7, 2 @ 1.6, 2 @ 1.4, 2 @ 1.1 lf - 2.0, 1.8, 1.7, 2 @ 1.5, 2 @ 1.3, 2 @ 1.1, 1.0
September 2 - day 12. E2 3995. LH 1. P4 3.3. Lining .9 Follicles rt - 1.9, 1.85, 1.7, 1.6, 1.5, 2 @ 1.1 lf - 2.2, 2.1, 2 @ 1.7, 1.5, 2 @ 1.3, 3 @ 1.1, .9 Trigger shot at 8pm
September 3 - day 13 blood work only. E2 5886
September 4 - egg retrieval. 7 eggs retrieved.
September 5 - 7 eggs mature, 3 fertilized. Start progesterone in oil and estrace
September 6 - 3 still going, all grade 2. Two 3-4 cell, one 5 plus cells
September 7 - embryo transfer. Transfer all three embies. All grade 2, two 7 cell and one 8 cell.
September 14 - progesterone blood test - 32.8
September 14-19 - hpt negative
September 21 - beta - negative
4 - July 5 - E2 356, LH 2, P4 2.7 Follicles 1.5 (likely cyst) on right, 1.3, 1.2, .9 on right (cyst may be gone), lining .9
6 - July 7 - E2 673, LH 2, P4 4.7 Follicles 1.5, 1.0 on right, 1.4, 1.3, 1.1, 1.0, 0.9 on left, Lining .9
7 - July 8 - E2 833, LH 2, P4 4.6, Follicles 1.5, 1.0 on right (no change), 1.6, 1.3, 1.3 ,1.3, 1.1, 1.1, 1.0 on left. Lining .95
8 - July 9 - E2 1206, LH 2, P4 4.4 Follicles 1.5, 1.0 on right, 1.75, 1.5, 1.4, 1.4, 1.3, 1.3, 1.1, 1.1, Lining 1.0
10 - July 11 - E2 2203, LH 3, P4 3.6 Follicles n/a on right, 2.1, 1.7, 1.5, 1.4, 1,4, 1.3, 1.3, 1.2, 1.1 Lining 1.0
11 - July 12 - E2 3319, LH 6, P4 5.5, Follicles n/a on right, 2.45, 1.85, 1.75, 1.7, 1.55, 1.45, 1.3, 1.2, 1.0 Lining 1.0
12 - July 13 - E2 4849, LH 11, P4 5.9, Follicles n/a on right, 2.5, 2.0, 1.8, 1.7, 1.7, 1.7, 1.6, 1.4, 1.2 Lining 1.0
13 - July 14 - E2 5663, LH 14, P4 7.3, Follicles n/a on right, 2.5, 2.2, 2.1, 2.0, 1.9, 1.9, 1.9, 1.7, 1.3, 1.2 Lining 1.2 Took trigger shot at 8am. Post wash numbers 60M with 90% motility. IUI number one at 12:35pm
The planting schedule - 2009's epic fail
July 25 - start Marvelon birth control pill
August 14 - endometrial biopsy
August 15 - last bcp
August 17 - sign consents and pay fees
August 21 - baseline AFC 27, E2 259, LH 2, P4. 3.1
August 22 - start stims...225 Gonal F, 75 Menopur
August 25 - day 4 check in. E2 550, LH 2, P4 3.1. Lining .4. No change in meds, three small follies measuring .7, 1.0 and 1.1. Lots of quiet ones. Grow follies grow!
August 27 - day 6. E2 737, LH 2, P4 2.8. Lining .56. Follicles 1 @ .9, 1 @ 1.1, 3 @ 1.1. Back tomorrow, same meds, getting nervous
August 28 - day 7. E2 1036, LH 1, P4 3.4. Lining .67. Follicles right 1.1, 1.0 left 3 @ 1.3, 1.0
August 29 - day 8. E2 1389. LH1, P4 3.63. Lining . 73. Follicles - must update later, lost my paper. Ugh.
August 30 - day 9. E2 2154. LH 1, P43.4 Lining .7. Follicles rt - 1.4, 2 @ 1.3, 1.2, 2 @ 1.1 left - 1.7, 1.6, 1.5, 1.4, 3 @ 1.1, 2 @ 1
August 31 - day 10. E2 2656. LH 1. P4 3.2 Lining .7. Follicles rt - 2 @ 1.5, 1.4, 2 @ 1.2, 1.1 lft - 2 @ 1.8, 2 @ 1.7, 1.3, 2 @ 1.1, 2 @ 1.0
September 1 - day 11. E2 3301. LH 1. P4 3.63 . Lining 1.0. Follicles ft - 1.7, 2 @ 1.6, 2 @ 1.4, 2 @ 1.1 lf - 2.0, 1.8, 1.7, 2 @ 1.5, 2 @ 1.3, 2 @ 1.1, 1.0
September 2 - day 12. E2 3995. LH 1. P4 3.3. Lining .9 Follicles rt - 1.9, 1.85, 1.7, 1.6, 1.5, 2 @ 1.1 lf - 2.2, 2.1, 2 @ 1.7, 1.5, 2 @ 1.3, 3 @ 1.1, .9 Trigger shot at 8pm
September 3 - day 13 blood work only. E2 5886
September 4 - egg retrieval. 7 eggs retrieved.
September 5 - 7 eggs mature, 3 fertilized. Start progesterone in oil and estrace
September 6 - 3 still going, all grade 2. Two 3-4 cell, one 5 plus cells
September 7 - embryo transfer. Transfer all three embies. All grade 2, two 7 cell and one 8 cell.
September 14 - progesterone blood test - 32.8
September 14-19 - hpt negative
September 21 - beta - negative
Who Am I?
For some background on who I am and our journey so far, visit my first post, made August 1, 2009.
11 comments:
Shannon....I am sooo very sorry...."FUCK" is right....I am thinking about you and I am going to keep checking on you....
FWIW......I am sending you tons of peaceful vibes....
2Be
So sorry Diva, thinking of you....
Such crap.
I'm really sorry - Infertility is the biggest asshole ever.
//hugs\\
Diva - I had so been hoping for a positive outcome for you. It really.fucking.sucks. It's not fair and it's just not right. Thinking of you and DH at this time. Sending big, HUGE suffocating hugs your way.
I am so deeply sorry.
Thinking of you and your DH.
Shannon, there just aren't any words. I am so extremely sorry this didn't work out for you. :(
I've been following your story as well and I remember reading somewhere that you think that adoption is not for you..have you thought about surrogacy?
I'm so sorry DJ =0(
Thinking of you ((((hugs))))
Oh man, what shitty news. I'm so sorry to hear it was a BFN. Hopefully you'll get some answers about why you were told to go ahead when stims didn't seem to be going the way they were supposed to (at least according to your E2 response). Ugh. I hope Dr H has a brilliant idea for next time, if and when you gather the money and energy and mental strength to go through this again.
Shannon, I just read your post and want to give you a cyber hug. Sorry.
Post a Comment